Dating Yoda, Comedy Kate, and Mistress Nanny were all present and accounted for, excited to be meeting the legendary Magic Mike. And things went well! Funny stories were told, he offered his male perspective on dating in Las Vegas, and my friends clearly approved. Mistress Nanny had to leave first for a high profile nanny gig on the strip, followed by Dating Yoda who had a full line up for later that evening, and Comedy Kate, Magic Mike, and I were having a great time. Comedy Kate was about to leave and asked if I would be needing a ride home, leaving a clear opening for Magic Mike to say no, he would be taking me home, so we could spend some one on one time together. I said I wasn’t sure, so she headed to the ladies room. And that’s when all hell broke loose.
Magic Mike transformed from Prince Charming to frog in five seconds flat. Yelling at me, he launched into how furious he was that I hadn’t driven. “If you wanted a girl’s night, you could have just gone and done that,” he said, followed by, “I felt like a fifth wheel the entire night.” I was gobsmacked. I explained that I had asked him if he wanted to come over to my house to watch movies and had asked if he was ok with my friends coming. He didn’t care. He continued yelling at me. Later, a friend asked why I didn’t throw my drink on him. I was in shock. I work really hard to be slow to anger and quick to forgive, but here was the guy who knocked his first impression out of the park and he was yelling at me in a public place. Not acceptable ever. I appreciate men who are direct, but I like my candor delivered in a normal tone of voice from a place of resolution.
Comedy Kate came back to the table and I was ready to leave. You’d think this guy just discovered I was a hooker- God forbid I should be a responsible adult who doesn’t drive drunk. He tried to pay for my drinks, but I refused, proudly throwing down $40 on the table and flipping my hair on the way out. So, what happens when you put Prince Charming on a pedestal and he knocks himself right off? Comedy Kate knew just what to do. Onto another bar!
Walking into Chicago Brewing Company, a bunch of drunk frat boy types actually cheered our entrance. It was a sign. The bartender called our requested shot of RumChata and Fireball the “Christmas Come” and delivered one after another after another. At some point Dating Yoda joined us after one of her dates and by that time Comedy Kate and I had torn Magic Mike into a million little pieces. At some point he did send an apology text taking responsibility and I forgave him instantly, but when I awoke the next morning with my hair hurting and confused as to why I had cold Taco Bell on my nightstand, he had unfriended me on Facebook. Because we are 12.